Hallelu!

Dear Fellow Christians & others,

Welcome to my new little chubbyhole here on the interweb.  I just can’t tell you what a blessing it is to have this new technology available to people of God for the purposes of ministry.  As you sit there at your computer reading this, I have no doubt that you came here today looking for porn or for instructions on how to build a bomb.  But friend, today is your lucky day...because you have found a place where the sweet peace of the Lord will literally fly off of your computer screens and sear into your eyeholes.  You have found a place where a Godly Christian woman has been able to harness the evil of the interweb, strain it through the colander of righteousness, and then chuck it back at you right through your computer screens.

Here on this blog you’ll find information about me and my work as the backbone of my beloved 80,000 member mega-church, Good Tidings Apostolic Holiness Christian Fellowship of Saints.  You’ll also find some information on how you can pay me to come and talk to sinners in your neck of the woods (I prefer not to talk in prisons or adult book stores).

I pray that you will return to my website time & time again for sustenance in difficult times.  I pray that as you see me exemplify Holiness, you will want to put down your stick of pot, put your clothes back on, get the tattoo removed, and let your pierced nether regions grow shut.

May the love of the Lord swell up inside you till you near about bust...

Only because I am commanded...Love, SM

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